Sunday, January 31, 2010

Gratitude ~ Gratefuluness ~ Goodness

"Never Believe That A Few Caring People Can't Change The World, That's All Who Ever Have"
(Margaret Mead)

This Sunday morning finds me with tremendous gratitude and gratefulness for all the goodness for all that is in my world; and to all who  left the wonderful and the funny comments to my beautiful Mom;
Dot Sowers for her birthday!

Yes, for as long as my thoughts have been filling this site, from those of humor to heartache to healing ways ~ ~ ~ her birthday tribute indeed has had the most comments to date! Isn't that a "hoot"!

And for that I am grateful, I am filled with amusement, much gratitude to those of you who took the time to write and to wish her a happy and blessed birthday. I am just tickled to death to those of you who wrote and had fun in doing so, kidding her even more about the stories; wondering about them, mulling them over and even wanting to have them be a source of intrigue... what fun!

I am reasonably sure that she let all of her friends across the country know that they should be checking out and perhaps they will become followers as well; prompting them to join in with their comments! Who knows they may even buy their own copy of Healing Heartaches, wondering if their names will be inside the cover, or more stories of Dot and her antics will also be there. Perhaps the next book should include some of those ... ummm food for thought to be sure!

My thoughts of gratitude, and goodness fill my senses. We have seen so much of that recently. From relief efforts for Haiti to first responders leaving the comforts of family, work, warm beds to go and lend a hand... Celebrities opening their hearts and their pockets and giving their time and talents to raise monies for the great need that is there. Goodness abounds in times of great tragedies and crisis.

But goodness can be seen on a good day as well, we only have to look. Recently I was on Facebook and a person had posted that their beloved Mother had died after a long battle with Cancer. Within seconds the computer screen lit up from "virtual" friends posting their deepest condolences; people that didn't know each other taking the time to care, taking the time to acknowledge the loss, to express their deepest care. That is goodness and caring that extends across the world just as Margaret Mead spoke of in her quote.

Lily the Black Bear had her cub, in her den in MN. That little cub is 8 days old now!!! She would have had that cub without human intervention, without pomp or applause. But with the brilliance of research, the technology at hand; a world was able to watch, to become enchanted, to be captured... to become involved and to care. People across the world were able to come together in gratitude for a black bear and be not do for a bear! A few caring researchers allowing a few to turn into thousands who became "family" to a North American Black Bear who will never be the same now that they have watched, listened and bonded. They have heard a bear cub and the similarity of its sound, its sound that is almost human... and they cried a cry of joy and gratitude and goodness. They donated monies for research, for protection, for goodness in the world. Again this is what Margaret Mead talked about isn't it? Healing Heartaches... living in amazing grace at times with random acts of kindness and gratitude...
Oh yes... I must also tell you that Lily the Black Bear now has over 74,000 fans on her Facebook Fan Page... ok, yes 74,000, that is the right number, and NOOO she hasn't been referring her fans to my page just yet, but I am ever hopeful .... You can donate or see Lily and maybe catch a glimpse of the baby and hear those screams at if you are lucky. The Web Cam is live and of course always on here with DRSES! Yes of course I have ordered the T-shirt "Captured by Lily" haha. I will of course keep you updated on my beloved Lily The Black Bear though.

My 15 year old Godson, D'Vante stayed with Mom on her birthday... they rented movies, even a scary one that neither could bear to watch! He served her dinner and waited on her hand and foot... and they waited for the snow! They both probably fear they will be snowed in with each other for days... haha
Their bond is as strong as two peas in a pod, they fight ~ they love~ they have had a great time I am told. They have made memories for Mom's birthday and I am filled with gratitude for that and for his goodness and what I hope for his future. He has probably grown tired of her reading him the well wishes of those who wrote on the blog while secretly hoping someone will comment about him!

And so it goes... I have heard from some readers who have told me how they miss their parents, those who have died... how they wish for that one last conversation or good time they never had the opportunity for. For that one more moment, memories that they cannot find... I do hope they will remember to re-read the series on "The Forgotten Mourners" and feel free to comment on other topics that they would like to read on!

To those of you I say, look for the goodness, the memories that lay deep within... "sit with it" awhile, write about it, pray about it... it will come. Write down what it is that you are wanting and put that near your bed, read it before you retire for the night ... do this several nights and then just "be". It may just be that you are working too hard at "doing" and that is preventing you from receiving the gifts, the memories that you are seeking. In time, they will come... Trust that you are a survivor, you are the legacy, find the goodness, the gratitude, and be grateful that you have been loved and have loved.

So for today, I am grateful for all that is, has been and is yet to be... Yes, I am grateful for those of you have have chosen to spend these minutes reading this too! And thanks again, for wishing Mom a Happy Birthday, and between you and me... she usually celebrates for at least a week!!! So it's not too late to shout out to Dot... "Happy Birthday Mom" heehe

One more day til February ...

Walk In Beauty,

author of
Healing Heartaches, Infinity Publishing

Saturday, January 30, 2010

~Matters Of The Heart ~

"Nobody Can Make You Feel Inferior
Without Your Permission" (Eleanor Roosevelt)

Ah but how true those words of such a great woman, how true they ring today. Not no--- body can make you feel nothing... without your permission... NOW repeat after me:


Didn't that feel good?  Isn't that an empowering thought?

Matters of the heart are difficult at times... as are relationships, friendships, families, lovers, loss, grief, abuse, hurt, beauty, art, animals...

Matters of the heart left to simmer and boil are similar to an old fashioned pressure cooker... you remember... those large pots with the little thingy on top that would shake and tremble and .... oh my if you didn't let the steam escape the whole thing could blow and ....

Matters of the heart can be like that too if they are left to simmer and stew and don't have a release... people get sick, hearts go flitter when they oughta flutter (technical terms here you notice I am sure)!  Feelings get stuffed, people self-medicate with drugs or alcohol... nothing good comes from stuffing feelings and matters of the heart over time I don't think.  At some point that proverbial straw will find its way to the camel's back and... "snap"!

You get where I'm headed right?  People need to find ways to express themselves in these days of high stress, complicated relationships, multiple and cumulative losses.  We need to learn from devastation how to honor and respect ourselves and those around us. We need to play better in the sandbox with others... how can we teach the children to play together if as adults we are lacking in those very skills?

Matters of the heart:  perhaps if people would tape record themselves in conversations with others they could better hear how they sound, better understand what and how others perceive them, why they get hurt by their words... perhaps we would get better at practicing mindfulness.. ummm, "think before you speak" I believe is the saying we've all heard as children!

Journalling is a wonderful way to let emotions out of those stuck places in your heart, to free up your mind and soul with the hope of making sense when things feel confused or hurtful in your heart. It may be that by writing it on paper you can free yourself from the clouds that skew your words and your thoughts, creating open pathways and healing to be yours. Most people I have known have a terrible time in the beginning of trying to journal... they feel it a burden, a waste of time, think it something they may be read by others. I will often suggest that they find a safe place to keep their pencil and notebook, perhaps even under the bed if need be... start small and work tall... maybe one line the first day, perhaps it would read like this...
Well here I am writing in this dumb journal and I feel like a fool. But here I am sitting and writing and I have a headache but I do think it is dumb for her to suggest that I am missing my son and that it will be good for me to tell write that I can't sleep because I keep thinking he will walk through the door and I don't want to miss a thing.

See that wasn't so hard now was it?  It will get easier the more you do it, and later on you will find that you can look back and see where you have been in your thoughts, where you are and the things you want to change, do differently. There may come a time when you even want to share it with someone. Who knows there may even be a book in there somewhere!

I had so many thoughts this week that today leaves me with this one and for this one I will leave you for today:

It's one thing to have sight, but quite another thing to have a vision like the Eagle, the protective spirit of the bear and the resolve and steadiness of the turtle along with the humor and wit of the coyote trickster...
All the while attending to the very sacred matters of the heart.

Do something good for you today; do something wonderful for someone else; an email, a thought across the wind, a cry from the heart of prayer and hope to someone somewhere.

Walk IN Beauty.

author of Healing Heartaches, Stories of Loss & Life

Friday, January 29, 2010


My Mom...
Today she is 29
She is the one on the right!

My Mom... Dorothy Eller Sowers, yep... that's her!
Happy Birthday Mom...
oh yes, and that is her imaginary friend with her!








My Mom lives in Dublin Virginia on a hill above where my Granny lived for years and years. Across the road is a railroad track and when the train runs you hear it long before you can see it... it shakes the house! I can remember running as a child to wave at the conductor; funny thing is, we will still do that when I'm there visiting! Dublin is a small little town, population 11,077 and Mom knows just about everyone there. Heaven help us if we are in a hurry and go to the store... cos' Mom has to stop and have a "hi how are you" with just about everyone she sees! This is a source of great comedy and often greater teasing from my 15 year old Godson D'Vante. He will even text me from the airport with this message, "Dot is talking to strangers"! haha
Thing is, Mom knows no strangers and Mom loves to talk!!! If you don't believe me, just ask Kamryn, Angie or D'Vante...

Ah yes, Mom is also a Red Hatter in her area... these great dames that put on their purple and red and show up en mass at the Nursing Homes, Hospitals, and Restaurants with their giggles and chuckles and good will abounding! The Red and Purple blaze being visible for miles away I am sure. Quite a bunch these gals are and Mom is the "grand poo-whatever" hahaha

Mom has been called many names & has many a story from & by her friends & family; and of course it would not be right if I didn't share some of that with you... after all Granny would want me to, and I am after all celebrating Mom's birthday with all of you this morning.

  1. It is Mom's hand you see on the photograph on the cover of Healing Heartaches! Now famous, I am sure should you ever run into her she will tell you all about having to pose for me and the 250+ photos that were taken! She will autograph the book for you as well which she did in Charlotte NC for a couple of women from the Philippines!

  2. Mom and I grew up together... which is why she is but 29 years old... or maybe by now she is 39, I never have been good with numbers.

  3. Mom has a bestest friend in the whole world named Lavie Coltrane... and they have been through just about every possible good and horrible thing two women could through together over their life-times including bearing witness to the pain of losing their spouses and holding each others' pain. (and they are both old as dirt)

  4. Granny used to call Mom "Boss Hog" and then we started calling her "The General"  Why you may ask... well, you see Mom's home sits on the hill where the pigs used to live back in the day! So once the pig pen was gone, (Mom was once chased down the hill by the pigs when they escaped) and the land was changed to be able to have a home for Mom it only seemed fitting that she would be "Boss Hog" hahaha!!!

  5. Now as for the title of "The General"... Granny & Dorothy & Me all decided that since Mom like to act like she was in charge we would let her feel like she was in charge by giving her that name...  It stuck through the years, and darn if she didn't act more and more like a General!!!  We would pretend to pay attention, but we really didn't cos' we all knew that it was Granny who really ran things, but we let her keep the title anyway...  But Mom could leap into action and line people up with their tasks and hold them to it... especially in times of heartache and tragedy. She would move em out! Get things done, but again that was back in the day when she was tough and before she got "mushy"!!!

  6. Now come the boys, Kamryn and D'Vante who she adores and who drive her completely crazy on any given day... they absolutely love to stand on her last nerve with their antics and practical jokes. They love to spend the night and play the WII, bowling, boxing, watching movies, throwing popcorn across the room, pillow-fights, and the like, all of which she is usually in the middle of when she is not the instigator of. And recently they've taken to calling their beloved "Dot" by a new name... They have dubbed her "Big Nose" making jokes and all sorts of things and then decided to call her that in public places; airports, restaurants, in front of friends!!!  So being the sophisticated & classy lady that my Mom is, she takes it all in stride and waits patiently for just the right timing... usually in front of the kids' friends or in a busy restaurant. And then it happens... she gets the attention of the boys and in a heartbeat with a gleam in her eye and without warning will open her mouth and stick out her tongue (which will have the contents of a bite of food) and then make a face at the kids! THEY GET HYSTERICAL & EMBARRASSED at the same time!!!  But they have a ball and wonderful memories are made; great laughs are had by all and others watch with amazement at the bonds between them are clearly visable from an 8 year old to a 15 year old to a single Mom of --- and an Elder and it is beautiful, and my heart and sould sing knowing "that is my family, that is my MOM".
  7. And then she comes to Florida and meets some dear friends of mine, Laura and Mitch. We spend time on beautiful Lake Tarpon and by the time Mom returns home she has yet another name... COB! So when in Florida and you meet my Mom, just say "Hello Cob" and she will answer I'm sure! That's my Mom, she'll talk to you like she's known you all of her life, and then she will tell you about her daughter, and she will sell you your very own autographed copy of Healing Heartaches too!
And so it goes... MY MOM is having a birthday today! And heaven only knows what is in store in Dublin Virgina. The great news is that she is good buddies with the sheriff there, and that makes me feel better. It helps to know that if she is out and about and running the roads with the Red Hatters, or with Angie and the boys and they are trying to make a spoon stick to the end of their nose and someone decides she or they are a danger to themselves or others...

It will probably be her friend who answers the call.

And somehow that makes me feel better!

On a more honoring note I will tell you: I could not ask for a more loving and beautiful Mother... whose love and support through the years have been a gift. She will visit Florida in March and we will celebrate her birthday and each day she is here. We will laugh much, love often and live well.

Of course I will leave shortly after her arrival for a speaking engagement and how wonderful it will be to have a built in baby sitter for the dog tribe!

I am one of the lucky ones, still able to laugh, love and experience life here with her and for that I give thanks... And So It Is!

At 73 years old, Helen Hayes said, "The hardest years in life are those between 10 ~ 70" I think she must have known my Mom! She has not had the easy road; it has been a path of heartaches, losses and tragedy some of which is written in Healing Heartaches, most of which is kept personal and honored as private. But she is a survivor, she is a woman who has found her way back from the uncertain and dark path of sorrow and into the light of hope and healing ways. As Granny will remind her and all of us with her sage advise, "Keep your head held high, even when your butt drags the ground". Granny taught by example that through tragedy we will survive... and some will choose to thrive.

Happy Birthday Mom, you walk with amazing grace in all that you are, all that you have given to so many through the years. Your dedication to your family; your volunteer work with Hospice through the years and your commitment to Highland Ridge Nursing Home and the residents there along with your service to the YMCA in Pulaski, your gallons of blood given with love to the American Red Cross and the Lions Club so that others needs are met  are all to be applauded and admired. YOU are my hero, and Granny would be proud of her daughter as I am proud of my Mother. "whole lot"

To all of you today... If your parents are alive, honor them, pick on them, love them and laugh with them... if they have died, honor your memories, live their legacy, stand tall for as long as you live they to shall live as you remember them.

I hope you will take a moment today, whet your breath and send a message of birthday wishes to My Mom, and honor yours while you are at it!

Walk IN Beauty

author of Healing Heartaches, Stories of Loss & Life

Thursday, January 28, 2010


Present ~ Future
Obama & Kamryn:
Sure would Like To See Them
Together For Some Basketball!

Our President (POTUS) took the stage last night... He is getting grey! Seems they all get that way when they move into the White House doesn't it?

Twitter is just ablaze since the speech with comments of his speech, journalists and newscasters and comedians all have their hands full with their comments and analysis of his talk: his body language, his intentions, his humility...

Kamryn looks like a mini Obama! I sent the President and Mrs Obama that photo of Kamryn and a very sweet letter telling them all about Kam; telling him of his passion for sports and asking that if he ever gets that court in the White House to please consider inviting the little 8 year old kid for some 1:1 basketball with him! (if he is not afraid of getting whipped that is) haha  After all,Kamryn IS the "next" Michael Jordon you know! We continue to wait for his autographed photo, but it hasn't arrived yet, but hope springs eternal I always say! Kamryn did have that photo shown on the local news station in Radford VA by WSLS showing him as "the Obama-Look-Alike"... he loved that and exclaimed, "Wow Mom, does that mean I'm famous". He got a real charge out of that, and of going to school the next day where so many had viewed it the night before and calling him "Little Obama".  He now walks a little taller and behaves a little prouder out in public anyway... never know how you influence a child by letting them know they have a role model and an image I guess!

OK, the thoughts are just moving fast today as the sun shines and the poms play around *(close I might add)* to the edge of the pool with their morning antics, barking and attacking each other, letting the world know "it's good to be alive"!

"A humble President stood before the Nation", the analysts said over the wires! Yesterday Katie Couric reported having lunch with President Obama and remarked that he didn't eat his pie, which indicated that he was deep in thought I guess! I wondered if perhaps it was an indication that he was full, or maybe didn't like the looks of the pie, but then again that is just my thoughts... and I am not the rich nor famous!

Back to those analysts whoever and whatever they really are... they said that our President did a "humility check"... hmmm
I say he has been in office all ONE YEAR PEOPLE... one year of the worst economic times since the great depression, since the war in Iraq, since we still can't find the man who was behind 9.11 (which I still have trouble understanding), since credit card companies still can hike our interest rates without telling us, since we can re-finance our homes and still lose them and save 12.95 while banks continue to pay their big bosses enough money to have mansions and 20 cars... He has inherited a mess and he has been there only a year, and he has been trying to build consensus.... he is but a human being. And yes, I accept many do not like him and that is OK with me. I know that their are party lines that we do not cross. But  I also know that when in crisis our nation's people come together.... we are in a crisis here!!!

I am not an analyst, not a politician, I am not the rich and famous... I am but one person, one voice in a sea of millions and trillions. I just don't understand why we the American people didn't get bailed out!
  • Give every American Citizen one million dollars;
  • let them pay off their homes; buy a home,
  • buy an American car,
  • make choices that they will have to live with,
  • feed our economy by the choices we make...
  • make Bank of America &Citi Bank get rid of their high dollar properties and high dollar execs
  • Have retired govt workers go on social security
  • Stop feeding the "big dogs" in government $$$
  • Listen to those that live regular lives each day
Did I mention... Kamryn looks like President Obama? haha

All I really am thinking is that our President needs to now take a STAND.. he has spent his first year working hard to try and build consensus with everyone... He has been humbled, he has made some mistakes, and he has grown and greyed.

It is time! Go ahead POTUS... I want you to take a stand! Get somebody's knickers in a knot, piss someone off and take a stand. Granny used to say, "It's better to be pissed off than be pissed on" so go on... Take A STAND!!!
Be the CHANGE YOU PROMISED US. Listen to Michael Jackson sing "Man In The Mirror" every morning and get pumped up... Remember the line and sing it out loud, "And it's starting with me" You can do this... The American people need you; Kamryn and his future depend on you... We need you NOW; our future needs you, my mortgage needs you, our men and women fighting to defend our freedom need you. OK, I get that our President has made some mistakes, he's a work in progress just like every human being walking this side of God's earth.

Me? I don't care much for ratings, and the judgments of others... I know that is not the same for the powerful, the rich or famous... they have to care, they have to be cautious that way. I could probably stand to be more cautious... particularly with those "fair weather" friends and our President is finding that out over this last year as well!

Perhaps it would help if POTUS did write that letter to my Kamryn! Maybe he should invite Kamryn to the White House for a little 1:1 Basketball with he and Michael Jordon. That's the ticket... POTUS and Kamryn; yep that would be good! POTUS could have Kamryn there to remind him of the benefits of child-like wonder, of taking risks, of boy stuff (after all he is surrounded by the Obama girls)! A min-me to reflect visions of hope in taking a stand, of reaching, of seeing beyond one's own abilities through belief and power. Why our President could even let Kam sit at the big desk in the Oval Office for a day and watch as Kam bails out the little people, says NO to the big ones that want, want and demand the outrageous for themselves and all that other happy crap!

POTUS said well when he urged an end to "partisanship, pettiness and anger". He could have made that even stronger last night by adding, "I want you each as a part of the greater whole, as a Nation to come together in being your best selves, caring like you've never cared before and join me in Taking A Stand to ensure that we will not fall in our great Country and that we together will thrive to survive this crisis".

Yes Kamryn, and Yes Mr President... there are disappointments... The President was right last night when he said, " No wonder there is so much disappointment, I too am disappointed".  Our families and friends sometimes fight and can't get along; there are times we miss the hoop and are disappointed, fights will disappoint, people can be greedy, institutions and corporations can and do get fat and cynicism increases because real and honest people can't move forward and seem to see no way out of the financial tunnels they have been stuffed into! However people are amazing, they are resilient and they are survivors... we are thriving and surviving even through all of this! On that you can be sure... Carry On, carry on... we are survivors people.

Change is never easy; no one likes change, but change is a constant in everyones' life. We are all change agents, but we fight it with each breath while each breath is in itself changing us everyday in everyway even on a molecular level!

Walk IN Beauty!
Did I mention that Obama Looks Like my Kamryn???

Sure would like to get him to the White House for a visit with our President ... so if anyone reading this has an in with the Obamas' tell them to contact:

author of Healing Heartaches, Stories of Loss & Life

Have you ordered your autographed copies yet?

Now available (*not autographed*) at:
amazon, Borders &

and... you can go to those sites now & write a review!!! YAY

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Wacky, Wonderful, Wednesday~

Smile, Laugh, Dance
Ah, So many Choices Today!

Wednesday morning and the chill is in the air once again in Florida... just checked my drivers license and yes, I do live in sunny and warm Florida! Here where the tourists come to see our beautiful beaches, bask in the sun and watch the magical dolphins play. Even a self respecting dolphin won't risk jumping in the gulf this morning for fear of getting ice on its dorsal!

Last nights American Idol was filled with tears, cussing and otherwise lack of talent... it left me laughing which is always good for the spirit and immune system, always good for conversation and once again Simon stood to the task of his witty comments! Ah an American Idol without Simon is like a Krispy Kreme glazed donut without a cold glass of milk to be certain...
And to think a reader of my blogs had her first experience of both last night! Sure hope she bought more than one donut... after all who could eat just one glazed krispy Kreme donut I ask you? haha
Bet little Kamryn wishes he could have sold her those donuts for the Radford Rookie's the travelling team!

Lily the Black Bear is resting in her COLD den where it is now -8 degrees! The researchers are still deciding on the name of the little one, and at last count there were a little more than a thousand viewing her on the cam. Last nights' storm knocked out the cam but those kind people have restored it for all of us who are continuing to be "captured" by Lily... I knew you would want to know!

Today my thoughts are of those who have answered the call and have gone or are going to Haiti... it takes me back to the days of 9/11 and being a first responder on the sacred grounds of the Pentagon somehow. Perhaps it is the horror of it all, the devastation and the smells that have been reported of death and tragedy of those left behind and the faces of disbelief.

I am worried about those who are there; the orphans of destruction, those who are grieving and I pray for those who have died... those who were just living their lives in their homeland when in a heartbeat everything changed.
I wonder how long it will take to re-build, to re-establish some sense of "normalcy" differently than ever before for a people who have lost so much so quickly. But I am reminded of the true resiliency of the human spirit and the outpouring of hope in healing and the acts of human kindness and touch that so many are extending. It is in these things that Haiti and its people will rise like the phoenix and find strength to heal and to stand whole again.We must grab onto and hold onto that core belief.

I am wondering what is going to be done for those first responders when they return home... is some of the monies that have been raised by the celebrities on that fantastic telethon being set aside so that they can receive follow-up from trauma specialists? Will their signs and symptoms of PTSD be recognized and attended to when they return to us or will they attempt to return to their worlds, their families as if it was just something they did? Will we hear months or years later of them "going off the deep end" as they have memories of the smells, the experiences, the horror that will prevent them from their lives and their joys as a result of not having really skilled clinicians to walk with them while they discharge and cope with those realities once home?  Oh my I have many thoughts this morning!

Perhaps it is because I have been asked to go to Haiti... or maybe it is because I am not able to answer the call this time, my health not being as good as it was at the time of 9/11; my family not as willing to let me go and maybe just maybe it is because I am just not up to the call this time!  My heart is there, my prayers are there... But I am unable to go there this time, and for that I am sorry.

 In my thoughts today, I will ask all to send their prayers, their energies and their dollars to support those who are answering the call as first responders. They are going to need us; they will need us to appreciate and to applaud their sacrifices, their caring for their brothers and sisters unconditionally by responding to Haiti and its people. They will not know how much they will need us when they come home, but I promise you... they will need us.

Many blessings to you and yours on the Wednesday!

Walk In Beauty,

Dr Sherry E Showalter, (aka, DRSES)

author of Healing Heartaches, Stories of Loss & Life

order your autographed copies at:

or you can now find Healing Heartaches available at:
Amazon and Borders (hahaha)

Please laugh today... even if its at yourself... Life is too short to wear tight shoes or to take yourself too seriously, after all, no one else will!

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Happy News!

Happy Day = Happy Thoughts

It's a beautiful and crisp morning here in Tarpon Springs! Yesterday found Jeepers falling backwards into the pool ~ ~ ~ yes, I saved his little silly self! The others just stood there looking quite perplexed as he struggled to get out of the water though! He was quite scared, his little heart just a thumpin! I don't remember moving so quickly as I grabbed him and yanked him from the shallow end of the pool while realizing that his little 4 pound self couldn't maneuver the stairs alone. Good lesson for the four-leggeds and for me . . .

Mental Note: poms can't get out of pool unassisted. Got it!~
OK, dried Jeepers and soothed his little (*usually quite large, ego) while the others laughed!

Now on to the greatest of news...

1. Received an email from a dear and lovely woman named "J" whose son Chris is mentioned in Healing Heartaches... guess you'll have to read it to know who he is! Anyway "J" has been undergoing treatment for Cancer and has just had her PET scan... She wanted me to know that:

Can I get an "AMEN", a "WHAT WHAT" a "Praise God I feel like Singin' here"... Well I have to tell ya, I read that email, the tears filled my eyes, I krumpled my kleeenex and then proceeded to enlist the four-leggeds in singing and dancing around the lanai with songs of praise and gratitude!!! I am so grateful and happy I could just scream, and scream shouts of praise I did.... "J, I am so happy for you dear one, keep on keeping on ... your attitude during this has been remarkable, you are an inspiration and I know that Chris has helped along the way" Thank you for emailing me with this wonderful news. I am sure everyone reading this will be sending you energy of health and strength as you dance on with the wonderful rhythms of life here in Palm Harbor"

More happy News today:

My Godson Kamryn who is 8 years old (and looks like a mini-me of Obama) is indeed the next Michael Jordon. He scored 18, count it out, 18 points in his last basketball game in Radford Virginia and is going to be a part of the travelling "RADFORD ROOKIES" playing basketball!~~!~~~ Right now they are busy raising money for this endeavor by selling Krispy Kreme doughnuts! hahaha  too bad the Godmother isn't there, I do love me some Krispy Creme glazed doughnuts! White mans' Indian food I call em'! heehe  My Kamryn, I've watched his passion for basketball since he was just about 2 years old; we've watched him with tiny basketballs and the little hoops that fit over doors and cost $4.95; he has focus, determination and can shoot 3's like you've never seen for a little kid ~ He and I've watched "Space Jam" at least a hundred times, with him knowing all the words and the songs! And yes, it is Kamryn in Healing Heartaches for those of you who have read the book, and for those who haven't ... well will have to order it at the link below and catch up! So, send Kamryn some good thoughts now as he travels with the Rookies! It's a first for kids in his age group to be doing this... what an exciting time for a 8 year old... who also happens to be the "next" Michael Jordon~!~~

Ah... can't forget Lily the Black Bear! Lily is resting, this morning it is some kinda cold in MN. Lily has got snow on her back but she continues to tend to the babe, who's cries and snorts and "squeeps" can be heard on the cam. The viewers have dropped considerably now that the birth is over, but the die-hards still watch, waiting to glimpse the baby and still delight in seeing Lily ~ ~ ~ She still has surpassed Jack Canfield, author of Chicken Soup For The Soul and Success Coach with her fans on Facebook!

Twitter is ever busy, and it is hard to keep up, but I have met Tony Gaskins, an author and speaker. He was featured on Oprah and Tyra 'Banks. A lovely young man of 25 with a wonderful book out and he also lives in Tampa. I look forward to emailing him soon and continuing to enjoy his thoughts. "Everyone falls down, but not everyone gets up. GET UP" that is one of Tony's quotes!!!

I read Tony's quote and thought... you know, Granny could have been famous in this age of technology. Just think about it... we have Oprah, Kelsey Crammer, Tony Gaskins, Deepak, Tony Robbins, Jack Canfield, Wilma Mankiller, Ellen, Whoopie, Simon, and all these folks...
and then we have had Granny... who would have said,

"keep your head held high even when your butt drags the ground" Now I don't know about you, but that quote should have equal billing of inspiring, uplifting and "keeping it real" don't ya think!!!

Have yourself the best day ever... that ought to really make others look at you and wonder what you are up to~!

Walk In Beauty

author of Healing Heartaches, Stories of Loss & Life

autographed copies available at:

also now available at amazon!

Monday, January 25, 2010

Rainy Monday Mornin!

No, This isn't Lily's Relations!
Monday Mornin
Rain & Ramblings

Good mornin world! Rain in Florida; snow & ice in Minnesota outside of Lily's den, and some flooding in Virginia I'm told, along with terrible weather in Sedona ...

Prayers and continued heartache for those lives lost and those who are struggling in Haiti ~ along with gratitude and hope in healing for those who have answered the call to go and help from all across the globe. The first & second responders to disaster...
they will need support, love and care when they return to their homes. Please send them energy, hope in healing and prayers for a safe return home.

The celebrities and stars came out with their talents and their voices to raise monies for Haiti.. they sang their hearts out and raise money they did! They cried; they spoke from their hearts, they entertained and their impact was seen, felt and heard. It was "tweeted", it was on "Facebook", it made the national news. And it was good! It was amazing how someone could gather that many people together so quickly, organize such an event at such a speed and turn out such a first class production. Bravo to all involved and all who care.

Sweet Lily the black bear is a wonderful mother. This morning finds her resting well! The babe is doing fine according to the researchers. The sounds are so similar to that of a human infant that it still amazes me! Her movements now are few, mostly to feed and move around the cub, assuring its warmth. Lily the black bear... doing what wild bears do, in her den without human hands to disrupt or annoy or invade has captured the hearts of thousands and made national news all over the world. She has made people forget their troubles, lay down their gripes and ugliness (*for the most part anyway) while giving birth on a live cam! Ah, I almost forgot, guess how many fans Lily has on Facebook???  Over 58,000!!!!!! haha Go Lily!!~!

My new friend Rick Cannon sent his latest writings to me, and it is another lovely piece. He didn't give me permission to share it, so guess you will have to wait for that!

It's a rainy Monday here in Florida and I am ever so busy launching Healing Heartaches, Stories of Loss & Life to all that I can. Believe they call it "marketing" and I am still finding my way regarding that!

I will tell you this: I am "blogging like a bugger", "tweeting like crazy" (which got me a punitive reply yesterday from a man who said I did not know what I was doing regarding social networking and that I would probably be called a spammer! He of course is a life coach, marketer,and author), I'm on Facebook and growing the fan page, now at 487 fans! Now as for the punitive coach? Three emails were exchanged: he is now following me on Twitter, (I think so he can write me and be punitive) I apologized for offending him with my *info tweet* about Healing Heartaches, but also said the other 1300 tweets had not received punitive mention!

In closing I will share a very funny story without mention of a name... ready?

I received a direct message from a "tweet" last night saying, "I'd love a copy of your book." with an address...  The person thought I was just going to mail one to her to read!!! On My DIME... hahaha
Ah but the wonderment of technology and the entitlement of the world!!!

'Wishing you the very best life has to offer today and always.

Wanna know my mantra? This was a saying that a dear friend I call "Lady Lord" told me years ago, now it is my mantra:
"I don't take Tylenol for someone else's fever"


author of Healing Heartaches, Stories of Loss & Life

Sunday, January 24, 2010


Lily is resting in her den
Baby can be heard "squeeping"
Whew... and the world learns
kindness and celebrates the North American Black Bear!

Ah, Sunday morning finds Lily quiet in her den with less than 2,000 watching the live cam... my phone is quiet, Sunday morning and coffee in hand after checking on Lily ~ Biologists Lynn & Sue have updated the site at and let us know that there is one cub! They say Lily is doing what she should be; keeping the little one safe; feeding it, keeping it warm, and trying to rest. We've been assured they are safe from the howling coyotes and humans. Lily's days of leaving the den are over; she now will spend her time right there in the den, overseeing each vocalization of the babe; doing what Mom's do I suppose.  Watching her now is often what my best friend first remarked as, "watching paint dry" most of the time! BUT, you never know... every once in a while you get a peek of Lily's beautiful face, those eyes... and then of course there is the "squeeps" and the little arm of the baby! Who would want to miss a chance of seeing that right? is filled with information about bears; about the research being done, videos and now have a gift shop for you to purchase the ever so cute Lily products... YES, of course I had to support by buying the "Held Captive by Lily Shirts"...

I had a wonderful email from my new fellow bear-friend Rick Cannon yesterday! I was honored that he loved the blog about Lily... so much so that he shared it with his family and friends. He shared with me that he had been inspired to write more of his thoughts and I was delighted. Didn't he have just a profound tribute to Lily yesterday?  And no, I didn't hear more from the women who thought I was "plugging myself"! HAHA... that was a first for me, I must admit, I have never been accused of that before...   oops, be right back, baby is "squeeping, might need therapeutic intervention"....

OK, all good with Lily, guess baby was just exercising its lungs this morning! Lily at times seems to rock gently and then magically the baby quiets... could it be she is rocking and warming and soothing the little one back to sleep? if you want to dig a little deeper into the wonder of bear world and vocalizations.

Back to my friend Rick Cannon; I want to share his lovely words and thoughts with you today: "Thanks Rick, you are a gift to both me and those who read this page!"

"...and so emerges from the monotonous hum of technology, the symphonic sound of a new life, the grunts, moans, cooing, and whining, the only form of communication between mother and child. Mother responds instantly to the relentless needs of her child and one can feel, as her baby feels, the range of emotions from the discomfort of hunger to the satisfaction of quenching that hunger just by listening to this cornucopia of vocalizations."

Now I don't know about you... but I'm thinkin that Rick is connected to our Lily and to the interconnectedness of the greater circle of life... and for that I give thanks and So It Is!!! Blessings to you Rick and I am sure that Lily thanks you as well...

Lily now has 59,884 fans on Facebook! haha
Go Lily ... I bet the author and now "success coach and multi-millionaire Jack Canfield is scratching his head wondering how in the world can he develop a new marketing strategy ...  the majority of these fans have sat spellbound, some have had a fear of the black bear requiring therapy; some have never ventured into the woods for fear of meeting the ole Black Bear while others can't stay out of the wood and mountains hoping for a glimpse.  Still others are teaching their children of the wonderment of our North American Black bears; classrooms all over the country have been teaching about Lily, showing the live cam and children's eyes have been wide in excitement. Me... I've blogged, I've kept the phone hot and had so many laughs with Joan and others that it's felt like Christmas! One reader has discovered Lily, Patti Labelle and American Idol all in one week...

Life is truly amazing isn't it? Every Day Is A Gift, just waiting for us to have the courage and excitement to open it and embrace it in all of its possibilities...

I even had the opportunity to meet Rick Cannon this week, thanks to Lily! She is giving humans an opportunity they wouldn't have had were it not for those wonderful people who came up with the idea to install a web cam in her den so that the world could watch, learn and listen.

I suppose life is truly like school... we are all here to learn, to teach and to absorb. WE only have to open our hearts, our heads, our mind and our gut.


We are all connected to all living things and thanks to Lily many are hopefully getting it... really getting it... we are all connected to all living things and we are not that far removed from the four-leggeds nor they from us!
That baby cub makes sounds just like an infant needing to be fed, needing to be loved, needing to be changed.

Lily is much more adept, advanced: perhaps humans should pay very close attention! For as Rick said yesterday; those babies will be given all that they need in a mere 18 months to go out in their world and survive and thrive based on the teachings of their Mother, Lily the North American Black Bear ~ ~ ~

Wishing you a soothing and beautiful Sunday ~ Hope you are safe in your den!  Keep those thoughts, questions and comments coming! Don't forget to visit Lily at: and dip into your money jar if you can! Did I mention how many fans Lily now has on Facebook?hahahahaha ~ ~ ~ c'mon Lily send them my way, to "Bear" your spirit human... heehe


Walk in Beauty

author of Healing Heartaches, Stories of Loss & Life

Saturday, January 23, 2010



We rooted... we cried, we begged, we coached... and at about 12:45 EST Lily gave birth to a cub... we heard the little one cry, its cry almost human, the sound clear as a bell!

My phone and chat on facebook went off at the same times...
"Hello Joan, Nana here!  YES, I'M WATCHING.... Hold on the other phone is ringing, Hello... OH MY &now, right now, wow, oh, my, wow; LILY HAS HAD HER CUB, YES YES YES, JUST NOW... Hold on, Joan is on chat, ... Joan Hold On... Let me finish my phone call , I'll be right back, yes yes yes I see her moving and yes it is amazing! Yes I see... she has more than 50,000 fans on Facebook today!!!! I'll be right back".

I'm crazed with Lily I tell you... She is a super bear ~ She has brought out the best in people! She has brought folks out of their own pained places; their own self-absorbed troubles. They aren't thinking about unemployment, politics, paying bills, fighting with family, losses unresolved or grief of the way things could have should have or would have been!  Of course we are all also sleep derprived; some late to work, or not at work at all! But many are wrapped up; all thinking about his magnificent bear and concern for her babies!!!  What a wonderful thing these researchers have done for the world... they have included us in understanding and loving the American Black Bear in a way unheard of before.

Oops... phone rings... "Hello?  hahaha, yes Lily had her cub and oh my you should her and hear  its squeeps and cries... uh... no I don't think squeep is really a word, maybe I just made it up! Or then again, I think it is a psychological therapeutic term that is used in specialized circumstances when a Mother Bear first gives birth to her cub in mid-January in her den with no humans around.... Well of course I am making that up!!!"

And so it goes, Lily has captured the hearts of thousands, she has even made the ABC news; she is the focus of Twitter, blogs, Facebook, schools, the workplace, OBGYN offices, chemotherapy rooms and all who have discovered this wonderful website... her birthing experience was observed by more than 15,000 people today.  And yes, I am writing while the excitement is fresh in my heart and my mind... don't want you to miss a thing. ANd yes, I have her on another screen with the sound on just in case I hear a "squeep" and have to look!

Joan and I chatted throughout the afternoon, blow by blow detail of Lily and her breathing, her twists and turns... the babies grunts, sqeeps and cries... WE think there are two... the verdict is still out for confirmation.  Yesterday a wonderful man made a post that left me with a krumpled kleeenex in my hand. He wrote of Lily with such tenderness and profound clarity, he too has bear spirit I am just sure. I was going to copy and paste his words for the first Lily blog, but by the time I went to the fan page to get it ... it was gone. But I had commented to him how he had touched me with his words. And wouldn't you just know it, he sent me an email of thanks this morning, with a copy of his words for me to post in this blog! So for that and for Rick Cannon, I give thanks, and So It Is! Someone is certainly blessed to call him "family" or "friend".

Bear with me a minute... "Hello Joan... Nana here! I bet you are exhausted watching Lily! Yes I want to see her face and see the baby(s) too. I wonder what little Olivia is going to think about Lily having those babies while she was at school today?  haha
Yes, we will get to watch Lily care for them and move around, but just think we can all sleep better tonight knowing that her hard work is now complete! Bet she will tell those little ones to be still and rest, she is tired!  OK, Nana loves you, bye for now!"

Yes, my best friend in the whole world managed to call multiple times during the day as well for Lily updates!  I of course am spirit talking with Lily to direct her energies into getting those 50k  plus fans to my fan page once she is rested!

Healing Heartaches, Stories of Loss & Life... once again the circle is continued in a bears life... we connect on a primal level, with amazing grace; sleeping beside a laptop with the volume turned up so that we can hear if a cub is born! We applaud researchers for their efforts in studying these wild bears in their habitat and not being intrusive but allowing us to bear witness to the wonderment of their world without harming them. We become stewards of their survival and we step outside of our own issues to applaud their efforts and hard work and we ask nothing in return.  We have Lily to thank for that...  She has brought out the best in humans.

I will end today's thoughts with the thoughts of Rick Cannon:

"Born in the icy grip of winter, naked in the frigid cold, these babies will be in the continuous care of of a devoted mother who has 18 months to teach her children the ways of life, to live on their own, find food, and protect themselves as they will be solo next summer, barely a blink into their existence. its quite amazing. we can send a man to the moon but we can't come close to doing what a mother bear does in a year and a half. No daycare, Nannie, or assistance whatsoever, she has a monumental job to do and she will do it with no complaints, her love and devotion to her children consuming her attention 24 hours a day. What respect that commands! Go Lily"   And to you Rick, I say thank you, God Bless you and walk with you in each step you make... you have bear spirit, you are blessed.

May all of you have a wonderful weekend and if you haven't visited Lily, please do:
and while you are there... read up on some bear facts, make a donation to them if you can!

Healing Heartaches, Stories of Loss & Life, those who have read it, know that I have been called many things, but one of the proudest and greatest memories have been those when called, "Bear, Bear Lady, Bear Dancing" and yes Bear Spirit is with me always, protecting, guiding and watching...

Thanks Lily for bringing so many together and allowing them to watch with respect and honor from a distance. Special thanks to those doing the research and Doug for his work with the cam... hope the cub gets your name Doug maybe with a "y" or "ie" at the end!!!  Gotta run, the phone is ringing!!!  Sure hope Lily can boost my fan page on Facebook; after all she is the Queen of Facebook; even Jack Canfield can't compete with Lily the North American Black Bear who is now a Mom!

P.S.... a small update at 0-dark-thirty... one last check on the website finds Lily working to keep the babies warm, and all is well in the den. The coyote was heard howling the howl of acknowlegment that the birth had occurred through the lands during the night... And then I checked the fan pages, and made a comment that I would be posting yet another blog featuring Lily... and quoting Rick Cannon! Well not too much time passed before two comments were made by women who were not pleased with me at all... they remarked that I was making a "plug for my blog" and felt it was well I won't say what they thought it was, let's just leave it at they did not think I should have used Lily's site let other's know of the upcoming blog "autrocious" I believe the word was and neither would be reading my blogs in "my lifetime" was their words... My heart sunk... in a brief moment I realized that what was done with excitement and enthusiasm was misconstrued by these women and made into something different... once again bear spirit had been altered into ugliness by human hands/judgment! The moral of this p.s.?  I'm sure there is one! haha... Lily would understand, I understand and those reading this will understand... as for the two women who tried to use words of dishonor and "assumptions", shame on them...

Mimosa's over the week-end with brunch in celebration of Lily the North American Black Bear who never has to be bothered with human pettiness nor conflict ! ! !

Walk In Beauty

author of Healing Heartaches, Stories of Loss & Life

order your autographed copies at: