~THANKS FOR TAKIN TIME~

Hey everyone, it's that time of the year... time to set your clocks back an hour! Don't forget, sometime tonight you need to run around your house and don't forget your car; you might want to start early! Now I always remember with the saying of "fall back and spring forward", meaning I gain an hour in the winter and loose an hour in the spring. To my way of thinking, we now will have 23 hours in the day right, or is it 25? Whatever it is, surely we have time to reflect, to remember and to take the time to make a phone call, to listen to a friend, to provide guidance to the young or engage in a meaningful conversation as in the picture you just looked at! If memory serves me right, that particular pow-wow, my dear friend Joan was engaged in a meaningful conversation with my then 2 year-old Godson Kamryn on the great fun he would reap from allowing her to play by "doing" his hair!!! Ah, the benefits indeed! He was most intrigued and benefited from the loving and time consuming conversation. He is 8 years old now and wears his hair cropped quite close to his head often being mistaken for a very young Obama! Just wondering if there was any connections there! hahaha
Ah, but I digress... Back to the hands of time. We fall back yes, that's it...  Time is a gift. A beautiful and treasured thing. If you are reading this today, not only am I honored, but you have taken your precious time to do so and I thank you. More importantly, you have wonderful choices to make with your time... It just may be that you can bring so much to a person with your gift of time. A phone call, a random act of kindness. Just yesterday I received an email that I may share with you in bits over the days, but today I will share the following:
I hope you will take the time to think about and act upon these truths:
1. At least 2 people in this world love you so much they would die for you.
2. At least 5 people in this world love you in some way.
3.A smile from you can bring happiness to anyone, even if they don't like you!
4.Every night, someone thinks about YOU before they go to sleep.
5.YOU mean the world to someone.
6. If not for you someone may not be the person they are today.
7. YOU are special and unique.
8. YOUR thoughts will determine what you do, what you have, who you are.
9. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good can still come from it.
10. When you think the world has turned its back on you... take a better look; you most likely have turned your back on the world!
11.Take time to believe.
12.Take time to wonder...
13.Take time to laugh.... even if at yourself!
14.. When you take the time to talk with and spend time with a child (like Joan did with Kamryn) it feels good and it makes a difference in a beautiful way.
15. Take time to celebrate this day, right here.... right now.
16... Take Time for YOU and those you love, and even those you don't, they will be better because you did!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!

Walk In Beauty...

~THUNDER AND LIGHTNING BEINGS~

Oh my how how the thunder and Lightning beings like to play... Scaring us at times with their antics to be sure. In Little Rock there is threat of Tornado's... It's Hurricane Season here in Florida, and one of my buddies on Face Book chat offered to send me some snow from Denver just this week! Ah, but the season of change are all around us and within us to be sure, often distracting us from looking at the beauty that most often is the result of the thunder, lightning and storms. Remember, storms never last... they just make us think that they do. And that my friends includes the storms that often erupt within....
There is nothing quite like listening to the thunder beings as they play in spirit land. The rumbling, the wondering ... will it rain, will the lightning bolt and fill the sky? Living in the lightning capital of the world, I now see a lot of spirits riding on the bolts of lightning! And oh my goodness... the rainbows that that fill the sky after times like this. They can take your breath away, but only if you notice them!  You would be amazed at the number of people that have never seen a double rainbow. I've been known to pull my car off the road and just sit and watch a rainbow, in awe at its beauty, filled with gratitude that I had for that moment been blessed with its presence. Remember the post about the Redbird? Well it wasn't long after that post that I received an email from a dear woman to share with me that her son made his presence known by way of the rainbow, not once but several times... Could it be that the lightning and thunder beings are the warning from loved ones that they are coming and bringing a gift.... and the gift is that of the rainbow?  Perhaps we would be wise to to listen for the thunder, to watch for the lightning and to pay attention for when the storm is passed... And then there is the story of Jaren's Mom who is frequently visited by Jaren by way of rainbows, butterflies and dolphins... She is blessed indeed to have so many visits from Jaren this way. But, recently while sitting on the beach, she looked up and saw a perfect "round rainbow" circling the sun! With a little research she discovered it is not possible to see this from the ground! Go figure, but she did!!!! Messengers indeed...
Many of us stand in awe of a storm, some distressed by it (I sure was when I first moved to Florida, not too fond of Lightning Beings it took some time to become friends) and others are soothed by storms. But there are few of us who miss the ceremony of storms in all their glory~ Just as few of us miss the impact of the storm within that affects our equilibrium and makes us forget that we are warriors at times! Here's a thought to stretch your imagination ---- Some have thought storms to be signs from the spirit world, messages from those who have gone before us. There are even some who believe that its the drummers drumming the dance of life, a celebration from the "other side" if you will! But then again, there are those who see the storms and thunder as an inconvenience, a storm is a storm is a storm and it will pass and life is the same as it has always been, and you just don't think about it!
But  for others, they pay attention and think. And for thunder beings,They pass quickly making noise, having fun, like so many emotions. Intense at first and then transforming... into rain, into new beginnings and sometimes a rainbow! If you pay attention! Reminds me of loss and grief that way, often out of our control, coming and going at will, interpreted differently depending on who is experiencing it. Often leaving us drained and weak in the knees, sometimes soggy OR sometimes refreshed and renewed or re-birthed!
Maybe it's really painting colors in the sky, messages in our hearts. Maybe we really do need to look through different eyes, to gaze differently than we ever have before. We need to pat ourselves on the back sometimes as we move through our day-to-day lives and recognize and remember that we are the warrior within, that we are survivors, that we are growing and healing and being kind to others along the way!
Sometimes we look so hard for something/anything that we are unable to see what is within. Messages and signs that we often are too busy, too hurt, to consumed that we don't even notice that are there, just wanting us to notice....Miracles can happen when the first rumble or drum beat of the thunder sounds....
The drum of life beats within you, waiting for you to join the dance of life, to celebrate this most splendid moment of your life! Troubled, heavy hearts often lighten after the storm... Usually feeling relief that the threat of that moment has passed. Amazing how it resembles change, loss and grief that way! The first colors of the rainbow can and often do take our breath away, can make us recall, remember and re-connect. The thought of the thunder and lightning beings can teach us to listen and look... and allow us to hope for the message, for the rainbow at storms end. Healing Heartaches, transforming us into life differently looking for rainbows within and all around while maintaining the mind-body-spirit connection in all that you are each day that you are. I wish you enough as you find the rainbow!
""I have made myself what I am" (Tecumseh, 1810)

Walk In Beauty

~SPIRIT TALKED~

I woke up this morning after knowing that I had been visited by Spirit. The messages had me unsettled first thing... ah, but I don't like waking up like that to be sure. I much prefer these visits to have wonderful messages of happiness, messages of good things... you know? But oh no, not today; today someone is hurting. Is it grief I wonder out-loud to the four-leggeds that are ever so happy to celebrate my rising?
After morning rituals, and coffee I open emails and begin to start my day, and it begins....
Emails of what spirit has tried to tell me. Emails of our friend grief playing havoc with a few; emails of physical challenge with others. And so it is... Spirit was letting me know of what is and the challenges become what to do with all of this information! The Cherokee have a saying of "just sit with it" and the answer will come.
We often face challenges, are visited and re-visited by grief. Particularly at this time of the year. I am convinced that as we lose the light and head into the holidays these feelings are intensified for some. By the way, DON'T FORGET TO FALL BACK THIS WEEKEND! You will gain an hour, isn't that good news!!!
Try to remember, most people that you will see in a regular day are facing some type of struggle, some kind of challenge in their world. This may be a good time to watch that movie, "Pay It Forward" and remind yourself of the power that can be found in random acts of kindness. It also may be a lovely time to make that phone call to someone for no other reason than to "touch base" and say hello. These small acts of kindness can reach far into the hearts of many during times of heartaches and facilitate healing. It takes so little to do so much for others at times. While giving of ourselves we can move beyond "self" and feel good at the same time.
Back to Spirit messages... and those who are facing illness, challenge, new beginnings, movement, change, grief. Change is the only real constant in the world, but oh how we fight it!
It is time to "dig a little deeper in the well of hope, the well of faith" and claim your warrior within. It is time to reach out and "ask for what you need" and rally the tribe around you for added support as you go through this.. It is your time to know that you are "a survivor" and that you are never alone.
It is time to know that your voice has been heard, your thoughts that were sent to spirit got there... After all, I woke up this morning and had received the message, even before I opened the trusty ole' computer! And my friends, it was loud and clear! And I say to you, the spirits in it and spirit is with you. The world and all that are in it are in transition and many are hurting, changing, going through similar challenges. Kindness and understanding will never go out of style. I whet my breath and sent a message of healing to all today, won't you join me?
"It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare; it is because we do not dare that they are difficult" (Seneca)
Walk In Beauty

~~AH, BUT FOR THE SOUNDS OF LAUGHTER~~

Dare to LAUGH! It is truly a healthy and fun moment when we can take take the time for humor. And let's face it, there are many a humorous moment in this wonderful life that we are so blessed to be living. It helps if you can believe in miracles; to believe in magic, to believe in the moment and the memories. It helps if you can remember to not take yourself so seriously!
In thinking of today's blog while it was dreary and raining, I went on search of a photo of laughter... this took some time as most photos are now on disc! haha... so as not to be thwarted I pulled out oh so many discs only to realized the darn ole thing that you put the disc into was in fact not working! As my friend and publisher John likes to say, "DRats." Now, not willing to be undone by this, since I had every intention of writing about laughter on a rainy day, I searched for the hard drive, hooked it up all by limited computer self, and found the above photo... It was worth it because I had a good laugh as I recalled these precious and "spoiled rotten " but ever so loved kids on that day having the best day ever and filling the kitchen with laughter as I tried and tried for a "sweet and loving picture"!  Fat chance of that happening!  The point here is that memories can refresh and renew and often take us to a place of sunshine in our hearts. A place where the sounds of laughter take over and fill our senses blocking out the unwanted noise of all else that may have occupied that space just moments prior.
That wonderful sound of laughter can and does blend in harmony with our own allowing us to look beyond the rain, the snow, the mud on the windshield... beyond the pain of struggle, the hurt of loss.  It can and will transport you along the journey allowing mind-body-spirit connection often in spite of yourself! Forgetting the little things that once seemed so large to you and upsetting your equilibrium like an inner-ear infection!
Reach out to someone if and when your heart feels heavy and you feel deafened by the silence. Open your heart, your mind and your spirit to fresh air, good music that feels your soul, good friends and celebrate your warrior within.  Listen for the laughter, notice its effects; pay attention to your cheeks on your face, to the power it has in your heart! Cherish memories as you listen to the winds of change... taste the rain, throw a snowball.  Storms never last... do they?
The Cherokee teach their young to listen... perhaps that is why the Creator gives us one mouth and two ears! We hear not the crash of cymbals or the noise of traffic... we hear the sweet song of trees, the thunder beings playing in spirit land, the rhythms of rain dancing on leaves. It is here my friends where as the Cherokee write "dikanowadidohi" angels sing!
I'm listening................... Are you laughing???
"Life does not cease to be funny when people die, just as it does not cease to be serious when people laugh" (George Bernard Shaw)

Walk In Beauty,

STRONG ENOUGH TO BEND

We are forever in transition, continually moving; changing directions, doing differently, liking the changing seasons and storms often more than we could have ever imagined. If we were to stop and take some nice deep breaths, maybe think about where we've been and where we might be headed... we would know that if is required of us it is only to be flexible! Not just flexible in seeing things in more than one color; one ideal, one belief... but bending without breaking. Knowing that we can see chaos around and not fall down under it!  It is our duty, or as the Cherokee would write, our "a da du da lv ned di" (obligation), to Move and Bend., without creating a rift in our own soul and spirit, thereby maintaining our mind-body-spirit connection.
After all, you and I both know that a house cut in to cannot stand! We are not so different than that visual you just held in your minds' eye.
However far we might stray in any direction, we must get it back together in our own house, the house within... we must bond with the law of our own spiritual being, which is to love our-self allowing us to love others' richly and without limits or condition. The journey and struggles through life, love, heartaches and healing will challenge you, your beliefs and all that you can imagine. At times it is a difficult journey to be sure. Be gentle with yourself while remembering the willow in the wind, STRONG ENOUGHT TO BEND without breaking. Enjoy the beautiful breezes on this fall day of October.
"I take you by the hand with all my heart... you have spoken comfort to us" (Little Beaver's Wife)
Walk In Beauty

A LITTLE FUZZY AROUND THE EDGES AT TIMES...

Having just celebrated my birthday I am thinking of so many things and feeling blessed on this most beautiful day! I have decided that life is so magnificent I will just continue the celebration until the end of the month; celebrating with friends both old and new; those I have known for most of my life and those I have never met except on the lines of this wonderful technology of email/facebook and even that silly game called Mafia Wars!  People are so open and receptive to befriending each other and offering well wishes when online. Yes, dear readers, even a trauma and grief specialist now has to admit, it is quite fun to rally the family and "ice" someone for their bad deeds! hahaha.... and of course I am available to provide support and counsel to the grieving families left behind. Keep in mind now... It is just a game! There is no tears without laughter, no grief without joy....

And so it is.... In a world of fast paced living, heartaches needing healed., balance needing to be restored, laughter needing to be heard..

In a world that does its best to make us a little fuzzy around the many edges; some people still manage to have bold outlines.  They know WHO they are ~~~~ They know WHAT they are about ~~~ They know what they can GIVE.  And just like them, just like YOU... the gifts are BOLD, BRIGHT and they are BEAUTIFUL!

So my friends, those of you who I have and have not met...

as I continue to celebrate life, my birthday and all that there is around me, I give you these gifts:

The gift of remembering and celebrating you! Not just today, but every day.

YOU can be the someone who does not compromise on being the person that only you could be!

YOU can be The person who doesn't hold back and isn't afraid to play and dance in the rain!

YOU are The person who freely shares the gifts that only you can give!

YOU are The person who embraces the Warrior Within!

YOU can be The person who finds the balance between healing and heartaches; laughter and tears, grief and joy....

While Discovering body-mind-spirit connection..... living and loving your life with pure intention and mindfulness.

Walk In Beauty friends.

WAS THE REDBIRD... NOW CALLED THE CARDINAL!

The Redbirds came to visit me this morning.... letting me know they were here by that distinctive chirp! I was enjoying the morning light as it came through the trees and cast its good morning shadow on the hanging Spanish moss, the dew glistening on the edges. Quite lovely to be sure, a beautiful still morning. And then they came; the Cardinals as we call them today. State bird of Virginia, my hometown! I do love them and their beautiful sound and color. Here on this lovely October morning they were visiting me and I began to reflect on how many times I have seen them when visiting with those who are grieving. It seems that they are messengers, perhaps their visit this morning was to prompt this blog. A reminder of sorts; it seems the cardinal makes its visit often to those who are grieving I have noticed. Particularly to parents or grandparents who have lost children whether small or big, little or grown. I can remember counseling a family whose child had died a horrible death one day and while they were talking about the need for some kind of sign that their child was at peace, I happened to glance at the window which was behind them and noticed the most beautiful brilliant Redbird staring in at us! I quietly told them they were being watched and as they looked behind them both exclaimed, "Oh my how she loved Cardinals!" And right there was the Cardinal just sitting patiently, waiting for them to only notice, only open their eyes and their hearts to receive the gift of its presence. The Redbird, the Cardinal, the winged one sent to them on that painful day of telling their story.
The Legend:
The Cherokee Story of the Sun's Daughter Becoming the Red Bird

Many moons ago the sun had a human form, it was that of a most beautiful woman. She traveled each day across the sky. Her daughter lived in the center of the sky, and each day the sun would stop to visit her. As time went by, the sun lingered longer each day, and these extended visits caused drought and precious crops to die.
The Cherokee people went to the little men for their advice. They were told they must kill the sun.
The people asked the rattlesnake to kill the sun for them. He coiled beside the door, and when the daughter opened the door for her mother, he struck. The brilliance of the sun had blinded him, and he had struck the daughter in error and she died.

The sun veiled herself in clouds to mourn her daughter, and the rains caused flooding. The little men told the Cherokee that they must go to the land of the dead and bring back the spirit of her daughter.

Seven of the bravest warriors, armed with Bois D'arc sticks, traveled to the land of the dead. Striking the spirit seven times, they put her in a large box to travel home. The spirit awoke. "I am so thirsty," she said; they ignored her. "I am so hungry," she said; again they ignored her. Suddenly she cried, "I can't breathe, I will surely die!"

The Cherokee became frightened and opened the box a tiny bit. With that tiny opening, spirit flitted out and became the Red Bird. She started calling out to her mother, who pushed back the clouds to see her daughter. Her mother was pleased to see her daughter in her new red dress.
So there you have it, the Legend of the Redbird, what we now know as the Cardinal! Is it any wonder that this winged one brings comfort to those who are grieving the loss of a child/grandchild? Spirit knows!

Butterflies are also known to visit parents, grandparents, and just about everyone after a loss. I think I have decided that it is the butterfly spirit trying to remind us of the beauty that continues in life.... It is the butterfly  and the spirit of those we love that reminds us. It is in the struggle, the very struggle that the butterfly must go through to survive. Freeing itself from the chrysalis with struggling and beating its wings allows it to survive. No one can assist the butterfly in that process. It is in beating its wings that it develops the strength that is needed to survive and fly! Are we that different? It is in our very struggle that we find the warrior within and know that we are in fact Survivors. Celebrate the survivor that you are, dance and find peace in the messages you receive, they are gifts from the other side, gifts to be cherished... and they are yours!

The winged ones come to visit those who have other losses as well; often they appear to daughter's or son's who have lost partners or parents or friends.... but it seems with those losses the winged ones are often messengers of wisdom. Hawks, Eagle spirits, sometimes Owls.... perhaps with age comes the power and insight often needed for those grieving losses of Elders or significant others! I don't know, can't give you empirical studies, I just know it to be true!
What I do know is that the messengers are there, if we but open our eyes and our hearts....
Look around you.... the gifts are everywhere!
Walk In Beauty

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Walk In Beauty

THE GRIEF STONE...

It's that time of the year... more and more people are reporting that old man grief is paying a visit to their hearts. Overwhelming their senses and leaving them with a feeling of great sadness, sorrow revisited. Some are reporting those feelings of "why me", "if only" and "I'm so lonesome I could and do cry", while others are isolating and withdrawing. It may be a result of the dark months that are here; we are losing the light of summer, heading into winter once again. Leaves that were once alive with their brilliant green, turning to crimson and orange now fading to brown and dropping to the ground.  Darkness falling earlier each evening... all giving way to our inner feelings of aloneness at times.
It reminds me of throwing a stone into the water sometimes. Remember? Throwing that stone, not really caring where it lands.... sometimes tossing it out there, just for tossing sake. Other times throwing, really throwing; letting loose with all that pent up anger, rage, frustration... letting it all go with the stone.  Whether gently or with great force, that stone creates a ripple.... a ripple that is visible and affects all things around it.
And so it is with grief; one person's actions/reactions to their visits or re-visits of grief symptoms has a ripple affect on all those who love and are loved by that person. It ripples through the nervous system, the "nuwati" if you will of those who care. "Those who stand by and are observers to the pain of the one who is grieving, knowing there is nothing they can really do that is concrete to take the pain away. Knowing that it is truly the person living through the grief that has to choose.... yes choose to stand, lay down, move forward, or stay stuck in their pain of loss.What ever the choice, many are affected and infected by the grief of others. They are often the recipient of the out lash, the pain, the frustration of the griever. And, they are often also faced with choices during the process as well. Their choices become: to lose sight of the fact that theirs is to just be supportive vs. become a part of the grieving! Another choice that must be made is: to become a teacher or a preacher! Teachers educate if they have the proper knowledge and tools; preachers on grief are usually not well accepted as only the one who grieves knows what they are actually going through first hand.
So, while it is important to do your grief work..... It is also important to realize that your grief has an impact on those still living, loving and enjoying life and enjoying you! Therefore you do have some responsibility to honor and respect that as well while making your choices.... Work your grief, Get Help, Stand Up and Claim The Warrior Within, Honor and Remember Your Loved Ones By Living Your Life, Live Your Life With Zest, Love Those Who Are Living, Right Here Right Now  or Stay Stuck in your pain and not move.
Choose wisely....
Taken from the Book Healing Heartaches:  "Lesson One, Who you are is not who you've been and you cannot go back there again. Who you are is different now. The true challenge along the journey is learning to live differently than ever before incorporating your loved ones into the rich tapestry of your life"
"You give little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give" (The Prophet)
Walk In Beauty

EVERYBODY'S GOT A BETTER IDEA!

I opened my emails this morning and to my surprise I had many, many emails! It seems everyone has some great thoughts for me today. Each fantastic in there own way. Some commenting on yesterday's blog, thinking it funny but inspirational, I liked those comments muchly. Some sent great ideas for Healing Heartaches, Stories of Loss and Life, suggesting title changes... oops too late for that now! But I do appreciate the ideas, maybe next book!
But then....
the emails came from the experts: you know the ones... from consulting gurus, people who market for you, tell you how to be happy, how to enrich your life, increase your sales of your book, those that will help you achieve wealth, security, bliss.... Wow, it is a day to be sure.
Now I have to wonder... if people are making six and seven figures telling me how to prosper and find my bliss; well, why must I pay for a stranger to help ME find what I have WITHIN ME???
Maybe it's me, but why are we looking outside for something that resides deep within?
I understand and have been a longtime advocate for talk-therapy to assist along the journey of re-connecting with mind-body-spirit when facing times of dis-equilibrium (transition, change, loss, trauma, grief). But, I am becoming more and more concerned when reading and receiving constant mailings from people offering me free tips and advice and then selling me things for $1.00 + $4.95 shipping to enhance my life!  C'mon now... let's think about this.  I've recently heard more and more people claim that they are responsible for Jack Canfield's success of his Chicken Soup for The Soul than one can imagine and Jack seems to be doing quite well for himself, with hundreds of thousands of followers along the way! There appears to be a great longing for the right words, the right insights that we long to hear, things that will magically help us to achieve what we feel we are lacking somehow. Could it be that we have forgotten we are WARRIORS WITHIN?
It is time to claim our Warrior Within, knowing that it is ours and ours alone. No one will ever know you as well as you do. Stand UP, move and know that you hold the key to you , the riches to you life. You do not need someone else's words to give you permission to stand for you. Those are your rights, your freedoms, your journeys to live.
I am reminded of the recent sweat lodge tragedy in Arizona where lives were lost as a result of a man making huge sums of money from people while promising personal enlightenment. He conducted a Native American sacred ceremony without respect of Native American tradition or people with 60 people in a sweat lodge, disregarding safety, tradition, culture... lives were lost needlessly. Why?


"I had a dream...that the maker of all was Wakan Tanka...to honor HIm, I must honor his works.  (Brave Buffalo)  We are His works and it is good. I wish you enough.
Walk In Beauty.

Breast Cancer Awareness Month

I went today for my yearly mammogram... here 4 days before my birthday! My mind on so many things; the book, Healing Heartaches, today's blog (yet to be done), my dear Mom who is having resurgence of old man grief hitting her hard and fiercely, those that I have walked with through many journey's of loss and grief.  Ah, but I was ever so busy this day as I made my way to be pushed, pulled, squeezed and mashed. Anything to rid my mind of this temporary pain that I would soon experience while chuckling to myself that this machine had to have been developed and designed by the male species to be sure. I was given the usual message, take everything off from the waist up and put on this lovely cape, it snaps at the top.... Yippee I thought it snaps at my throat and my boobs will just flap around my waist to be sure!  Great, just what I need for my self-esteem.  OK, I can do this.  Then of course you get to sit; and sit awhile longer, greeting other women who appear a bit anxious in their capes as well.

And then the lady who handles boobs of all shapes and sizes comes for you; checking to be sure that you are in fact who you say you are by looking at your name on the bracelet you are wearing. I think if a person answers easily to their name when called, they are probably indeed that person, but who am I to question a system that appears to be working.  With that said we go into the room of the man thought of machine and she directs me to it.  Many directions to be sure, directions that involve my feet lining up with the center of the devise that my boob fits in; directions of looking over my shoulder, relaxing my shoulder, leaning in, being still (all while she is manipulating, pulling) and then the big squeeze..... OUCH. All done, now for the next angle!  Whew, we're done... I am more than ready to lose the cape and retrieve my t-shirt and bra, but am told to sit tight....

An hour later I am sitting tight when told it will be a while longer, uh..... wait.... Dr. wants to do an ultra-sound.  OK, off to ultra-sound with coffee in hand we go.  There that wasn't so bad now was it?  Just have a seat, we'll be with you.

I'm sitting.... and then I meet a lovely lady who actually says, "Good morning"!  What a wonderful relief, a smiling human who is in a cape like me and is waiting... And then it happened, with no ceremony, no idea of who either of us are, no introduction:

She says, "Life isn't always fair you know... people need to just get used to it and get on with their lives, stop having pity parties and just party!"  I laughed out loud and then she told me she had Breast Cancer, had lost many friends to the disease, and had decided long ago that life isn't always fair.  She went on to say she used to have depression, enjoy pity parties and was close to becoming a bitter woman and then one day it just happened.  She just made a choice to LIVE HER LIFE LIKE IT WAS THE ONLY DAY SHE HAD TO LIVE.

With that declaration the boob lady came out and told us both we looked good and we could go and get dressed!  We were GOOD TO GO, and doctor says to come back in a year!!!  Oh thank you, thank you, thank you!  For all of us who have good news today, I say thank you.  And to this wonderful woman, I say thanks for the blessings you provided to me and those who read this today. She filled my heart with her story and I hope it fills yours as well. We all have the ability to choose how we want our life to be, feel and see.  Choose wisely, it's your life!

So there you have it: 

Walk In Beauty

THE PROPHET

"When you are sorrowful, look again in your heart and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight. Some of you say, Nay, sorrow is the greater, but I say unto you, They are inseparable" (The Prophet,-Kahil Gibran)

Just a thought... Could it be true that if we get through this one hard place today, right here, right now; all our problems, pain, sorrow and thoughts would be solved.  Each day has its share of challenge, of pained places........ IF NOT FOR US, FOR OTHERS!  You are the Warrior Within, reach out for someone who may be having difficulty on this crisp autumn day, and help yourself along the path while doing so. Stepping out of your pain and into the moccasins of another to ease their journey if only for a moment.
Walk In Beauty

THE COLORS OF FALL

The colors of fall are showing themselves, proud like a peacock in some places to be sure! Will we be ready to focus our Eagle eyes in order to see the splendor, the glory of the days ahead? Can we see the forest through the trees? A newborn doe can't walk sure footed or focus their sight too well in the beginning... mastery takes time for all. The doe that was so peculiar looking, awkward but oh so cute, will move step-by-step and then bolt and run when least expected~~~~ All the energy used to inspire provides humankind the power necessary to achieve mastery, to move step-by-step through any journey we encounter; if we will choose to allow it. Often the endeavor to move is emulated by a moment of respite, an emergence of renewed hope, found energy and then without fanfare we take a big breath and get moving again, we sometimes even "bolt" into action~!

Every new sunrise becomes a little easier, each step a little more sure, and every nightfall less pain-filled. But in the daylight, we become keenly aware of the beauty that surrounds us, the majesty of the crimson and orange leaves as they fall to the ground. We become aware, sometimes painfully aware of the change to brrrrr, from the warmth of the sun in the summer that we knew.

Then there comes a time of transformation and change; growth and confidence in the abilities that have taken time to see and focus with our own eyes. There are many such circumstances that continue to challenge our very beings, just as there are with the four-leggeds. It is all part of the sacred circle of life, the disposition of things; that will pain us, challenge and change us. Each step toward loss and life, growth and healing, that we may enhance our vision. All helping us to engage and witness the splendor of life, remembering colors, while having protection and solace in our memories. We can again notice beauty that has been postponed and choose to dance in the brisk fall sunlight and play in the leaves of change. We may see change and heartache as not so threatening, not so overwhelming. We've chosen to move, to rest, to renew and to take control of our journey and heal. The journey continues, we are restoring balance to our worlds. The power of hope and healing will intensify our endurance as we walk differently than ever imagined while embracing the colors of change.

"Whatever the gains, whatever the loss, they are yours." (Five Wounds)

Walk In Beauty

Brrrr. there is a chill in the morning air

In the morning light stretch before you get up... as soon as your eyes open to greet the day, as soon as your feet touch the floor feelings begin to fill our thoughts! Not only do they critique our circumstances, but in a heartbeat they also decide if this is a good day or if it should be one of apprehension. This is the moment to get out of your head and into your gut! The exact time to claim the "warrior within" and to be powerful. Stand quiet in those feelings while painting on the canvas of your day; the way you want it to look, to feel, to smell and to be.
You can tell the misinformed feelings that they are not acceptable to YOU, that you have painted a different day for yourself than days past or moments past. It is a NEW DAY, it is your day... A day for you to make a choice that can allow you to experience happiness and healing above all other choices. A new day that you are controlling right now with your feet planted on the floor, stretching and claiming your warrior within. A new day that you are able and capable of engaging in, embracing and making changes where changes may be needed. These are the times that make a person go against routine, move out of comfort zones and take control of what they want, need, desire in their lives. A time of building and re-building the minutes and hours as they discern appropriate or that just "feel right" for the time, bringing about body-mind-spirit connections.
"When I make peace, it is a long and lasting one. The is no end to it." (Santana)
Taking control of our lives;our struggles,joys, losses, grief, hope and healing is a sign of growth. A desire to want more, and to re-gain balance in our world. It is a choice we make of how we spend our days. The daylight and darkest of nights can be frightening times. The hottest days of summer and the coldest of the winter morning can be painful when feeling out of sorts and forgetting that we do have the option to choose how to think, act, feel about our present and future situation and still honor what was and who we have and do continue to love.
Walk in Beauty.

A CHEROKEE LEADER ONCE SAID...

A Cherokee Leader once said, "it is important to have a vision that is not clouded with fear."
Perhaps this statement could be well taken in the journey of life, struggle, challenge, loss, grief and the path to healing.  Remember a time when we were able to see beyond the impossible by enjoying a vision of how we wanted things to be, how we wished things to be, how we wished things to stay?
As children we could do this or that and it brought unlimited joy (if only to ourselves at that moment in time). It seemed that life reacted freely... but then we had to go and grow up! We learned to love and to invest, we became "civilized", and for some of us our visioned "narrowed" in the process. We should try to re-establish our relationship with the child within and the visions of wonderment we once knew then.
Many times in our path through life; in challenge, struggle, new beginnings, loss, grief and healing it would seem that we develop the vision of a traumatized mouse. ONLY seeing up close and unable to focus beyond the intensely painful moment that we are currently finding ourselves in. We ricochet off walls desperately searching for the security that we once knew looking for that little hole to retreat to. Sometimes the vision is just too narrow to see.
Learning to expand our vision, to see through different eyes is the task. Learning to view our life; our challenge, struggle, new day, love, loss, grief and healing through the eyes of the eagle will give us the needed perspective to grow and heal. It will nurture the warrior within, allowing us to look in the mirror and see ourselves with a new appreciation.
Through the eyes of the Eagle we can see where we've been, we can focus on that which needs our immediate attention and we can have a grand look at the bigger picture, by seeing LIFE, and we can see it all while soaring to new heights. 
There are few things ever spelled out along the journey, but soaring with the Eagle will allow you to focus on what you need, what you want, and the belief that you are a proud survivor in all that you do. To open yourself up and look through different eyes takes courage, strength and willingness.
"There was a time...our wants were within our control...we saw noting we could not get." (Sharitarish)
Walk In Beauty.

NOTICE: TITLE CHANGE

The book, Krumpled Kleeenex title has been changed in this the 11th hour! Thanks to the powers that be at Kimberly-Clark for finally responding to my inquriy of oh so long ago. Blessings to the makers of generic brands I say :)

THE NEW TITLE:
HEALING HEARTACHES, STORIES OF LOSS AND LIFE, Infinity Publishing
content the same!  Spread the word, thanks for the support, and if I didn't mention... Infinity Publishing rocks.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY!

It's strange at times how the same words spoken last week have such different meanings today. I'm not sure what we could say this week that has not been said in weeks past. Have you ever wondered what could possibly be said that has not been said before by so many? The Cherokee have a wonderful saying, "Listen, or your tongue will make you deaf."  But they also say I love you, I admire you, I want to more about YOU, and I admire your courage. That is the ultimate amount for one day isn't it? But again, it cannot compare to tomorrow... Tomorrow has its own jar needing to be filled. Likened to a jar of marbles, we can only hold so much at a time before we overflow; and if we are not careful our jars can be emptied by ourself or taken by others very quickly. Learning to control the ebb and flow of energy, or marbles in our jar takes mindfulness, takes learning balance, mind-body-spirit connection if you will.
As the seasons change, time moves swiftly like the fox, the need to be loved; to be admired, to be validated never changes. It helps us to grow, to heal and to maintain balance in our mind-body-spirit and it helps us to keep our jars filled with give/take. It also helps us to appreciate the finer things in life; the four-leggeds, the winged ones, the water beings, the connections of all things great and small., knowing that our time together is linked in beauty. Creating memories to sustain us in times of change, times of great struggle, times of pain, loss, grief, growth and healing.
"O, Listen! Hear! Sing with me, For I am joy. I am at Peace!" (Cherokee Song)
Walk In Beauty!

Just a Thought

It is truly amazing... those feelings that just pop up and overwhelm us leaving us weak in the knees sometimes, even weak in spirit at times. People just wandering along and thinking about their lives, their struggles; maybe their challenges or pain of loss, sometimes feeling "out of control", just tending to matters at hand ~ and then it happens. Something so strong that leaves humankind feeling weak in the limbs and oh so alone and vulnerable! Discovering that once again you have no sense of control, feeling bewildered by tears, thoughts, feelings and out of balance within and without. Out of balance with the world around you. It is at moment that you have forgotten "The Warrior Within", and begin to feel alone and sequestered in your pain, that is not good friends.
I have good news to share with you!  These are normal powerful emotions along your journey and "The Warrior Within" is still "Within"!!! Rather than perceiving this as a "break-down" perhaps it is the time to "look-through-different-eyes" and see it as a "break-THROUGH" the pain. It may be one of the hardest lessons in life both to learn and to accept, but the reality of our world is there are times when we actually  have little control of things that touch us and affect us in our world. Try as we might, there are things that will influence our equilibrium. It would be comforting to think that we could control all aspects of our lives, but not very realistic. Remember throwing a stone into the river.... remember the ripples and the influence of it hitting the water... it affects all. That's pretty much the same with humankind. Ah, but again demonstrating the importance of "paying it forward with random acts of kindness" as well!
You may determine you have most control in your surroundings; your home feels safe perhaps. You control who you let enter (or not), the mood you create, the sacredness you surround yourself with! Even though there may be times when you long for another to hear your pain, to hold your fears at bay, remember... you are the Warrior within and hopefully you are learning to call on that light to shine through! We are so very communal by nature, needing others more than we like to think! By extending your heart to others, you have become vulnerable to the pain of loss, the door of disappointment and the great wealth of love. I hear there are many gifts to be received by others' by allowing them to offer and provide support to you during your times of happiness, pain, struggle, loss,  grief and healing while giving you time to rest and restore and feed your Warrior Within. With others you can honor the memories of loved ones, you can tell your stories of loss, of struggle,  victory and triumph's. You can share your life, remember... and experience the blessings of support. There is no shame in asking for support, allowing others to "be there" for you, knowing you are different now than ever before; moving to a different and everchangin bright light, holding dear those things you cherish while finding the strength of your Warrior Within to release the rest.
"It may be that some little root of the sacred tree still lives." (Black Elk)
Listen for the sound in your heart ~~~~ It will soothe you and bring you comfort. Walk In Beauty.

YOU ARE THE WARRIOR WITHIN!

Anytime we fall down in doing anything and we get up and have another go at it, count it as progress! It is in the "getting up" that makes a warrior, (di tli hi) as the Cherokee alphabet would say. Getting up does not mean the warrior is fearless, fierce or that s/he is one hundred percent self-confident. It does mean that s/he fully expects strength, faith and hope to come as s/he needs it. How about NOW? (na quu na) as The Cherokee say? Whether caregiving for a loved one, grieving losses by inches or the finality of death... it is painful and an exhausting challenge. One that will change your world and your very essence forever. The task is to learn to live a rich and full life with those changes! Everyone has times of being afraid, uncertain, and unsure of their footsteps along the journey; some fear falling down and staying down. That is when faith, strength and tenacity of purpose will serve you well. Relying on yourself, your beliefs (The Great Spirit), friends and family (of birth or choice) gives us courage to speak powerful words that will bolster the human spirit. So... how about now? (NA QUU NA)? Asking for help from those who have walked the walk, guidance from those who have "been there", trusting in time to ease your pain of loss. The journey through grief is a long one my friend; one with many turns and bends along the way, there may be times of great struggle, BUT... YOU ARE A WARRIOR.  You will get up, you will get through this. Your grief will become a scar of honor, a testament that you have both loved and been loved.
"I know the Great Spirit is looking down upon me from above, and will hear what I say." (Sitting Bull)  You may be quiet, but you are warriors, you are survivors. Walk in Beauty.

Dawn's Morning Sounds

It's morning... still dark on the edges of the sky, and the birds are waking; their sounds of morning pierce the stillness. The sun will soon find its way to us. Fall is in the air. The Gathering Season is definitely here.
Those who are grieving losses already feeling the effects of losing the light as the dark months approach us. Sad when that happens, it seems that when we fret we begin to lose sight of the beauty that surrounds us, we lose the ability to hear the sounds of the birds singing their songs of excitement as they celebrate another season and the laughter of the squirrels as they find the treasure of acorns. It is an exciting time of the year to be sure!
When we stop fretting we gain more ground. If we can stop trying to control everything with our minds and let it go, even for a little while, we will get a clearer view. There is wisdom in the words, "having done all, stand." Do what can be done, build faith, know there is a Great Spirit that knows even the very smallest of things that we need, want and desire. The greatest steps are taken when we decide to not lose ourselves in the moment or in the confusion or in the drama of others. Lay it all down and walk away on a path of something different. Step into your own, "no pressure zone", you might like it there! Having done all, stand; and refuse to be drawn back into a place of no peace or no laughter or no joy.
"The man who sat on the ground in his tipi meditating on life and its meaning, accepting the kinship of all creatures and acknowledging unity with the Universe of things, was infusing his being the true civilization." (Chief Luther Standing Bear)
There will be times we cannot control our grieving, our tears, our anger or our sadness. We can learn during the journey, and we will grow. Know that your path through grief will have many turns and twists and scary moments. When you just let go; often your path will become clearer, the days will look brighter, you will be a different person than you were before. And you will know it is always darkest right before dawn. Walk in Beauty.

Cherokee Thoughts for October

How like moths we are when we are caught in the dark, beating our wings against anything that stands between us and the light. Though we strain against barriers, we are the "a tsv s dv" "we are the (light) or candle that lights the place we are! Others who follow; they watch for a signal, a light in the dark to let them know they are not alone. We may need to take some time to be quiet, to recharge and it just may mean waiting for awhile in the dark. But, whatever the need, whatever our need, if we will but wait... the light will come. It will illuminate our way instead of blinding us with its glare. And so it is good.  "The path is rough and many gloomy hours obscure it. May the Great Spirit shed light on yours" (Black Hawk)  It is in the dark times that you may find comfort in knowing that you are never really alone. You have others in your world and others on the other side. Others are always with you, and they are cheering for you! Take comfort in that presence as you wait for the light. It will come. It always comes. Walk In Beauty.

Fall's evening

The darkness is falling earlier each evening now that we have entered fall with all her mystery. We are losing the light, the crisp night air blowing the palms here in Florida. Tonight while still balmy, their is a difference in the breeze; the four-leggeds sense it... They romp with wild abandon, noticing change all around them, gleeful almost. Change is in the air. We humans would do well to notice as well. Time to begin "the gathering season" preparing ourselves for the dark months. Gathering our resources if you will! Time to leave a lamp on in the evening so as to not return to a dark home, time to enjoy the light; be outside, celebrate fall. Blessings to you and those you love. Every days' a Gift~!

Author of Krumpled Kleenex, Stories of Heartache and Healing

Author of Krumpled Kleenex, Stories of Heartache and Healing
http://www.drsherryeshowalter.com

My Godson Kamryn: vote for him as Obama look alike in Readers Digest Cute Kids http://www.readersdigest.com/ and see photos. His picture is titled: Obama Look A Like!  Too funny... He would love some 1:1 with our President almost as much as Michael Jordon (almost)

StillTasty: Your Ultimate Shelf Life Guide - Save Money, Eat Better, Help The Environment

A very interesting site to be sure, Author of Krumpled Kleenex, Stories of Heartache and Healing. Blessings.

StillTasty: Your Ultimate Shelf Life Guide - Save Money, Eat Better, Help The Environment

Octobers' Glory

The day's are splendid with their cool and ever-changing breezes with cardinals telling of their bright landings in trees for all to admire. Change is in the air.  Krumpled Kleenex, Stories of Heartache and Healing, Infinity Publishing... Coming Soon. Visit the website for information and resources. Blessings to you and those you love.