Friday, May 17, 2013

Good things happen to, bad things happen to...People

 An oldie but a goodie... When bad things happen to good people. I heard this said just yesterday, with it beginning with the word "why does Bad things happen to good people".
As I read it, I thought of this old standard, and my mind reeled off the many times I had heard this question and the many times I had thought had appropriate we could ask the question in these times and days. I immediately thought of the many needless deaths we have heard of, have witnessed on media, the many diseases and diagnosis that millions are suffering with, the children of abuse and of Sandy Hook, their families, the Boston Bombings, the men and women that fight for our very freedoms and the list goes on. I thought of the many families that lay awake at night worried about family members who seem to not care that the worry is happening, and the many good people who are involved in things that seem to happen randomly entrenched in the lives of others they love so desperately now in harms way. what a question one that involves such great thought.
I thought of so many in the prayer bowl, so many who struggle daily and who fight with all their might just to get through each day yet manage to keep an attitude of gratitude.
Yes bad things happen to really good people it seems; always has and probably always will, while others who we shake our head about seem to go about their lives without a care in the world or regard for anything or anyone and are of good health and little regard of anyone or anything if measured against compassion, kindness and goodwill to others.  Some out there get bumb raps, and a hard deck of cards handed to them. It's not the hand dealt so much as it is the way the hand is played that makes the person. Some will be self-absorbed, tunnel visioned or "wannabes" in order to fit in or to milk things for all they are worth, while others will forge ahead and find their way to greatness, living their dream and swimming against the current in order to do so. Yes, there are times that bad things may happen, but it is how we approach the good the bad and the ugly that make the person and those around them, it is about loving and looking for the rainbow after the storm and learning along the way looking that moment dead on with reality. It is also the reality that sometimes really good people can make really bad choices. Perhaps the first time they make a mistake in life... but after the first time they make a choice. Whether by association or by those they choose to be with, hang with, or even the choice to not do anything differently that too is a choice. It is in our choices that sometimes bad things, really bad things result; and ultimately they can be cumulative and like trying to stack cards, all of a sudden they begin to tumble down, and it can be quick or slow, but ultimately they all come down. It can be devastating, it can be life changing for the good, or for the bad. It can leaving one shaking their head or their whole body trembling and saying, "what in the world has happened and why is everyone against me".
Again a choice is faced; one to accept responsiblity or two; to enter denial and say it is not my fault or my choices I am being framed or judged harshly. Either way, it becomes a time of reckoning and usually integrity is on the line, Karma along with reputation and character is left questioned. A good person with a bad choice is left standing at the steps of pain, loss and heartache, often self inflicted secondary to getting caught up in moments of associations and the moments.   
 Life is complicated that way... It doesn't mean everyone is bad, it means they are humans who often have fallen into bad associations or bad judgments or not the best of friends.  It happens, and we are seeing it more and more with friends and those wanting to be something that they were not raised to be. No one grows up with aspirations and hopes to be less than a good person, or at least not most people. They just get caught up in their youth, their immaturity, their quest to fit in, and before you know it they may end up in the wrong places at all the wrong times.  With a blink of the eye, something goes terribly wrong and there is hell to pay, many lives get changed and life as we knew it is never the same. There are those times that trust is violated or there is a suspicion of lies through a history of untruths that leaves one to doubt and hurts are had and those are hard to recover from.  Once trust is lost, it takes years to repair, yet at times you have to wonder if it can ever be like it was (unless you are delusional) and would rather ignore reality.
Some can convince themselves of those things, yet it is not healthy.  Then there are times when news and people hit us so hard we are taken to our knees; but we fail to remember that while there we are once again on solid ground. We can while there be still and give thanks that we are... we are capable of standing again, stronger than before, wiser than before, more compassionate than ever before.  We can learn from things we witness, from bad choices that not only we make but those bad choices we see and hear of others making. We can learn to set tighter boundaries for our own balance, and to restore the balance we have with others while teaching and commanding respect in our own honest right way relations. We can honor all living beings and living things by saying, "I love you but I do not like what you are doing nor the path you are on."
We can help others by suggesting that if they want change, that change begins within.

 

 we can honor our path, our pain, the pain and loss of others, while recognizing that each path is different, and yes there will be times when bad things happen to good people and at times bad people seem to walk free. There are also times that bad people have Karma, some have swift justice served while for others justice seems to take a very long time and we often doubt if it ever rolls around.  Each person will view right from wrong depending on their relationship with the person involved, each will have a definition of good vs. bad and what makes a person tick on the inside and the out.  We will look at another and we will wonder why and what they think given how they act and the persona that they present to the outside world and that world of family that supports and loves them... how they or we treat those closest to us and those that we support.  We will laugh and remember old sayings of "you can tell a lot about a person by the way their dog looks at them; or you can tell a lot about a person by the way they treat their family... yet in this modern technology of the internet and social media, many will tell a lot of a person by their posts, their online profile and photo. We look at pictures, we google, we think a lot of folks by those they associate with and what moves them in music, in photos, in times spent with those they love and if they smile with their eyes and laugh in times of good times and bad.
We listen to what is not said as much as what is said. We grieve as a Nation when bad things happen to good things, and sadly we have become de-sensitized to horror, to crime, to things that used to make us cry... we see too much of it. But we still look to the youth at times to help us remember joy and laughter, yet we know hear of terrible things being done by youth and little children and to them.
We mourn for them and pray that good things will happen for them and they will exceed all our hopes as they grow. We give them messages to assist; from great people including Dr. Seuss: 
 We hold onto hope, we hold strong to faith and on tight to the realities of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness and I too equality for all. Yet I also know that our young people are into some wicked shit... synthetic drugs in mini-marts, access to liquor and prescription drugs, parties on campus' that put them in harms way, and a litigious society where they are governed by good times that could end in a lawsuit and someone being hurt, maimed, raped, or dead from an overdose. Most are out for a good time on a Friday night, and in a heart beat something goes dicey, risk taking happens, and lives can be forever changed, just like that... a life with promise can be lost forever.  We must be present, be alert, we must talk to them, preach if we must, lay down hard if it takes that, yet not give up on the future of our leaders... we must put in time for the little ones, pursue the many options that may be theirs in 15-20 years and get them enthused about school and sports and mostly about passion in life.  As adults, we must discover our own child, and re-learn how to play, to discover the joys we embraced not so long ago as we jump in puddles and find our own way to fun exercising great choices and finding passion in laughter and light. We must encourage others and ourselves to remember;

 Yes, good things can and do happen to good people, bad things happen to good people, BUT, if you want to live the dream, to strive to up your game... move into the next level and move away from negative people, run from those that will bring you to a level that makes you look less than you are.  Outshine the sun in all that you dare to dream and raise the bar on being all that you were born with to be all that you want.  YOU are the one to change the sails of your ship if you do not like the direction the ship is going, so cast off and experience the newness of the waters that are in front of you.
Let your word be as strong as your feet with each step that carries you to greatness as you reach out to one that is worthy of you and your love... as you reach out to those who have stood by you, that have embraced you and assured you of their undying love... Reach out in compassion, in truth and integrity as you walk the higher road of reality in your life and in honor.

 walk in beauty
DRSES


34 comments:

Anonymous said...

Good morning your words of wisdom has hit home this morning. I think you have covered the topic very well and said the words that need to be said. Good things happen to good people I wonder sometimes do some of the people want to be good or do they think they are above the working hard and following their dreams or just go out and get what they want and not work for it. It seems that young and old are out for themselves and not thinking or caring about the people who love them and mourn their lack of love and respect for all. There are so many young and old people who want to get what they want without working and there the problem begins. What life will they have ahead of them when all goes wrong? I read about these things everyday, hurrying to get there without concern of anyone else. Your words today should be read and reread over and over. Step up to the plate and stop hurting yourself and your family the ones who love you. The ones who have given too much. Live and be true to yourself and your loved ones. Its not too late to make amends. Blessings

Liz Brewster said...

I think that in general, it is a mistake to categorize people as "good" or "bad". Those that do us direct harm, such as those who pulled the trigger at the oh-so-many recent shootings...I'm ok saying they are "bad people"...but in general, it is a matter of perspective. To many, I am a "bad person". They sit and hope that karma gets me...knowing that there will be some kind of divine retribution for the "obvious" wrongs I have done. There are others who see me as a "good" person...loving, kind, generous, etc. Good and bad things happen to all people...it is called life. The first sentence in the book "Everything I needed to know, I learned in Kindergarten" says this: "Life is Difficult". Life is full of joy and sadness, ups and downs, and it is those things that make us all human.....

DrSES said...

well how great to see an old friend Lizzie visiting once again, and for the record one of the goodest folks I know.. yes Life is difficult, filled with ups/downs and turn arounds and it is those things that make us all human; the good the bad the ugly and the most remarkable...

blessings to all who gather here on this most beautiful beginning of the weekend. Good to hear from anonymous and from an old dear heart, when the karma bus rolls through I want to be the driver! haha

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Anonymous said...

helloooooooo
and how wonderful to see some comments here today !!
powerful and sincere words once
again , and a timely message too.
Yep, "good things" happen to all of us ~ and everyone gets there share of the bad too.. it does seem that attitude and perspective play a key role here... today I am honoring my Mom, my trusted wisdom keeper who passed eight years ago and at that time, my world stopped. Since then, I have endured more painful loss, at times I thought I would never survive and often questioned "why me" ??` I knew in my heart I was not a BAD person, yet I also knew I had choices to make to move my life forward and to find the goodness in the world ..it surely has not been an easy road yet I have come to realize that all around us,within an arm's reach, all the tools to a happier life are available..the choices are personal. In honor of my Mom,although my heart feels a bit heavy, I will live her legacy..
I will appreciate all the good in my life, smile at the memories and realize I need to be grateful for all I have, appreciate the simple things, the sunshine, the song of the birds, the aroma of flowers, and know that love and respect for each other are most important.. kindness, generosity of heart and being true to myself are the keys to my serenity. I will 'pay it forward'.. cleaning out the closet and make a donation to those more needy ..
Self pity is self destructive. the old adage of "there would be no rainbows without the storms" rings true to my heart..
We cannot dwell on the evil, the sadness and the negative going ons around us. it is our choice and our responsibility to make our corner of the world a better place..
Thanks Doc, once again, for all you provide for so many of us. Thanks to anonymous and to Liz for speaking up .. your words are true and important to share..
Wishing everyone a great day, full of the good things we have to appreciate in our lives...
sign me,
hugging my angels, ♥
A.

DrSES said...

and i join you in honoring your Mom today "A" as you live the legacy, may you feel the sun on your face and know that it is she warming your heart, may you feel the wind in your hair and know it is she, your Dad and Jaren speaking your name and touching your soul while reminding you of all the good times and good things, as you feel the tears may you know that they are the telescopes to see into the heavens and may the dolphins jump for joy that you are choosing to move one step at a time into healing... wado!

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fluff said...

Thank you for the most inspirational and heart moving words today. It is good to see old friends words here. It has been a difficult few weeks. "A" my friend, I prayed for you today thinking of the loss of your Mom 8 years ago. This week is the anniversary of my husband's passing, Mother's Day and thinking about my precious Mom who has also passed 2 years ago so it has not been a very good few weeks for me. I do wish each of you well and have a very peaceful and pleasant weekend. I am grateful we are finally feeling Spring/Summer here in Michigan. The beauty of the green grass and lovely trees and awesome flowers blooming are so grand. Take care /Sandy♥

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DrSES said...

blessings to you Sandy; we have all missed you and I hope that spring will be kind to you there as the warmth and beauty surrounds you...

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fluff said...

It is so good to see so many comments today. Thank you Dr. Sherry for your words. Have a wonderful and peaceful evening. /Sandy♥

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